How My Body Tells Me When I’m Falling Off Track
I’ve learned to hate the Christmas season. Every year—I can’t wait for it to be over.
It’s 4:30 a.m. I wake up because my hands are numb. And now, I can’t go back to sleep.
My mind starts to race. Why are my hands numb?
I’ve also noticed those little, tiny flinches of pain near my heart. And I’ve always had heartburn—yet maybe it’s a little worse than normal?
Is something wrong?
After a lifetime of bad decisions, I feel like my body is wearing out. Or maybe it’s the neglect from my more recent ones.
Christmas was a few days ago, and like most people this time of year, I have a hard time keeping up with everything.
I haven’t been exercising or doing my daily walks. I keep pushing them further and further apart.
I do it every year. It’s something about the holidays—those parties and family gatherings.
It gets dark early. The weather is colder, and I don’t want to go outside.
It’s football season, so I watch more TV.
I eat more comfort foods. I spend more money than usual—and then I work less.
The result is guilt. I didn’t do the things I needed to do.
It’s so stressful.
Isn’t that funny? Christmas is stressful to me.
The one time of year I should be celebrating life, family, and friends—and I turn it into worry, regret, and disappointment in myself.
It’s punishment. It’s a heavy load. And I can’t seem to find my way out.
The numbing hands are a warning. I’ve noticed it many times before, right before something bad would happen.
I think it’s a sign.
It’s my body trying to tell me something—these little tidbits of evidence that I’m falling off track.
I remember years ago telling my cardiologist that my hands kept going numb while I slept.
He didn’t think anything of it. He said it was probably not cardiovascular—more likely carpal tunnel or something similar.
But I knew something was off. It doesn’t happen all the time—only during these special occasions.
I think it’s low blood pressure in my hands because there are blockages—somewhere—in my body.
Scary thought, huh?
But it’s not.
I mean—not really.
It’s normal. Normal to me, that is.
It’s amazing what you can get used to.
I know my body. It builds up blockages—or something like that—when I’m not doing the things I need to do.
I’ve got to get my heart rate up, so I can get that blood pumping and keep those veins flowing.
That’s what heart disease is, right? It’s merely a lack of blood flow.
After all these years, I know the signs—and I know the solution too.
It’s exercise.
It’s eating better.
It’s not worrying so much.
It’s all those things I must do.
Or else…
When I don’t do these things, I can feel it. It’s everywhere. It’s everything. It’s my whole body.
My gut gets full, sensitive, and upset. I get headaches, and my tinnitus gets worse. My body cramps, creaks, and moans with soreness.
I can feel it in my chest.
It’s tight.
It’s like it’s asking for help.
Please help me.
Please don’t eat that.
Please walk.
Please exercise.
Or else…
Okay then.
Fair enough.
See ya.
I’ve got work to do.
Listen to your body—it’s always trying to tell you something.
